Once upon a time... oooops.. :p I mean the other day I was very upset with my hubby, he did something wrong to me and my tired body added the anger feeling to the situation. One thing about my lovely husband is, he always apologies whenever he feels sorry for he's wrong doing, but I was not willing to forgive him (yet). Instead of solving the problem between us, I accidentally threw my disappointment to my 'lil angel when I saw her playing with her water, spilled it on the table.
All of sudden her happy face disappeared and I regretted my action as soon as I saw her, the way she looked at me that torn my heart into pieces, as if she was saying "why are you angry mama? why do you yell at me? i played like this before and you were always only telling me not to, but why this time you hate me for that, mama? i don't understand... i'm scared mama... your voice is so angry and loud. i'm sorry". She stood still and looked at me in the eyes for a minute or two until i grabbed her to tell her "oh Nicole, mama sorry ya... nicole jangan mainan air ya, mama sorry ya bentak bentak Nicole, maafin mama ya.." and she cried.
I cried too.
Then she stopped. Looked at me in the eye again.
Still silent...
Then, she hugged me, pated my back and gave me a love gesture (sayang, elus-elus kepala mama), and kissed me as if she was saying "i forgive you mama, shh shh stop crying, don't worry mama, i forgive you."
What a wonderful feeling... what a relief...
My little girl taught me how to forgive! She's only 19 months and barely can speak yet but her true heart is gold. Thank you Nicole, for giving me a good lesson in life. To forgive unconditionally. She let me experienced the most beautiful feeling of being forgiven.
I forgive Arie right away. I was ashamed, I suddenly remember the prayer that has been devoted everyday in my whole life... our Father, who art in heaven...
Hallowed be Thy Name.
Thy Kingdom come.
Thy Will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Amen.
Have you ever wonder, how would you feel if you are not being forgiven by someone you care so much one day? your spouse, your family member, your siblings, your dear friends and even worst, your children? I could not imagine how terrible that would be.
Just forgive, without any other expectations, that's love.
